The yet to be named fic
by Zork the Unbearable
Summary: Its PG just incase, I can't remember anything in appropriate but you never know! ANyways I can't remember the story to well even though I wrote it the smornin, so you will just have to read and review.


Hmmm I would just like to say I have been very very bored lately and I had nothing to do because my friends were all at Uni. So I was a very boring person and watch season 1 of Stargate it took me 20hrs but I did it, then I watched season 1, 2, & 3 of Futurama, then I watched season 1, 2, & 3 audio commentaries of Futurama. I do suggest you listen to the ones with 3 voice talents on them, it is very confusing but well worth the listen! Yeah hmmm maybe I should go now?  
  
Nah, I am having way too much fun! Besides I have to write a disclaimer and all that blah blah blah boring stuff!  
  
Disclaimer: I am stealing the characters from Stargate SG-1 for my own personal use, I shall not be returning them but remember guys I am not profiting off them so please don't sue me! I also have no money so you probably couldn't get much out of me, suing would probably cost you more in legal fees than the amount of damages you would receive, I'm a full time University student what could I possibly make out of these characters? Also the following shows also do not belong to me: The Basil Brush Show, the Rocky and Bullwinkle Show, Batfink, Roger Ramjet.  
  
Actually I don't think I own anything in this entire story, the concept has probably been used before so maybe I should just stop writing this and hope nobody sues me or claims I stole their ideas, which I probably did, but that doesn't matter right now.  
  
Zork the Unbearable.  
  
Oh there are probably spoilers if you have never watched any of these shows.  
  
Any ideas as to what I should name this fic? Hello anyone? Anyone at all?  
  
~~~~  
  
Why hello there, welcome back to the SGC hope you had a good time. Oh yes I'm the narrator of this fanfic so please just put up with me because you know narrators can be quite an addition to any show. Just look at the Basil Brush show, the Rocky and Bullwinkle show and to a lesser extent Batfink and Roger Ramjet. But I digress Ah yes we are here at the SGC to see how our favorite SG Team is going, that's right folks SG-1 are back for another exciting adventure! Lets go see what is happening in Daniel's office where he and Jack seem to be.  
  
"Wow that Narration is really getting good."  
  
"But nowhere up to Basil Brush standard, anyway why are you here Jack?"  
  
"Um to annoy you, because Carter locked me out of her office"  
  
"I am a genius why didn't I think to lock my door? Put that down Jack!"  
  
"It's just a rock"  
  
"It is an artifact and it is priceless leave my stuff alone please"  
  
"But Danny I'm bored"  
  
"Do you want to do something for me?"  
  
"No"  
  
"What if it's a top secret mission, which General Hammond must never find out about. Which will require the utmost secrecy and stealth?"  
  
"Okay what is this mission?"  
  
"I have a package that needs to be collected, it is currently in my car but unfortunately the General has a rule against using the thing in the package. Once the package has been collected I need you to bring Major Carter, Teal'c, Sgt. Siler and Chevron Guy here. To do this tell them I said the package arrived."  
  
"When should I go?"  
  
"Go now Jack, god speed"  
  
Will Jack get the package from Daniel's car? Will the General find out? Will Daniel remember to lock his door next time? Will Chevron Guy's name ever be revealed? And what was in that mysterious package? The answers will be coming up right after this Stargate theme.  
  
*Music begins, here laughing and two really bad singers but very good writers/producers start singing* AN: Yes that's right the singers are Paul Mullie and Joseph Mallozzi, to here them really sing, get Season 4 episode 19 called prodigy, best audio commentary ever, really they do sing the words to the Stargate theme, it is funny but a surprisingly well written song.  
  
Stargate It's a great big whirl Step in to the swirl And it will take you To another world  
  
Stargate It's a crazy trip You can go quite far And you don't need a car Or even a ship  
  
There's Colonel O'Neill Carter And Daniel And Teal'c Look out for those Gogogogogogoa'uld  
  
And we join Jack as he walks out of Daniel's office  
  
"Okay Jack you know what ya gotta do, just think it through is there any reason you would want to go to the surface that wouldn't be suspicious? Think damn it think"  
  
"Um Colonel is there any reason at all to explain why you are standing outside Dr Jackson's office and muttering to yourself?"  
  
"No sir, there is no logical explanation that comes to mind General."  
  
"Well could you stop loitering and at least try to look busy"  
  
"Yes sir"  
  
"And stop talking to yourself, the airmen are already scared of you."  
  
"Right I'll try General."  
  
"Ok, Jack the General has gone, now what should you do? You will probably need an accomplice, but who?"  
  
Ten Minutes later Jack and Teal'c are on the ground floor  
  
"O'Neill I do not understand why we are here"  
  
"Because we have to get something from Danny's car"  
  
"Why can Daniel Jackson not get this himself?"  
  
"I don't know maybe he doesn't want to be caught with what ever is in this package"  
  
"How do we get past the guards?"  
  
"We don't, and stop doing that eyebrow thing it's really creepy"  
  
...  
  
"T I said stop doing the eyebrow thing. Here's the plan we get Sgt. Siler to get the package for us."  
  
"How do we accomplish this?"  
  
"Oi Sgt."  
  
Siler looks up from what he's doing falls curses and falls again  
  
"Yes sir"  
  
"Could you do something for me?"  
  
"Is it dangerous or against the rules sir?"  
  
"No I just need you to get a package from Daniel's car, he said to tell you it had arrived"  
  
"Really? I mean I'll get it right away sir"  
  
"Could you take it to Daniel's office, I've got some people to tell about it."  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
~~~  
  
Well here is the end of chapter one! Yayayayayayay. If you would like to read more please review. I will only continue the story if I get a certain amount of reviews probably somewhere between 0 and 1000. But if no body reviews I'll probably add another chapter anyway.  
  
Remember your reviews are keeping me of the streets. 


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